Who would have thought that one of my greatest ah-ha's of my adulthood would happen staring at a picture of a resin-covered pec?!
Body Worlds had come to my city. The physical specimens are preserved almost forever for exhibitions and education through a technique called Plastination. I'd never been to see it. I was enthralled, excited, full of anticipation and ready to go no matter what the tickets cost. With this childlike enthusiasm, I bounded in to my husband and said, "Look what's coming! Let's go!"
Without leaving me 5 seconds of euphoria, he said, "That's gross. Why would anyone want to go see that?"
I felt like a whipped puppy with my tail between my legs as I slunk (that's a word) off to lick my wounds and ponder, "Why WOULD anyone want to go see that?" Holding the flyer in my hands, I sighed big and said to myself, "Well, I guess I don't get to go see that." And went in search of some, you guessed it, Chocolate.
As I was rummaging through the cupboards, I suddenly had a brand new thought. Just because he didn't want to go, did NOT mean I couldn't go. I didn't need his permission and he never withheld it in the first place. I was the one who had "grounded" me from my own exciting adventures.
That had been my pattern for 36 years: excitement, sharing the idea with him, and holding my breath hoping he'd say, "Yes." And disappointment when he didn't want to go, do, or have my great idea. I had put him in the position of Dad. And I was the child petitioning for a favor.
Wait - I'm a grown approaching middle old aged woman (if middle age is 45 then 63 is middle old age) and I could decide Yea or Nay for myself. Just as he did.
What a relief! My brain was exploding. The excitement came back. I called my adventurous son and we scampered off to look at resin covered bodies for hours in every position doing everything imaginable. My wonder and awe grew from one exhibit to another. I had a wonderful, fascinating, memorable afternoon. And so did my husband doing what he choose to do for his Saturday.
The next adventure was a new museum exhibit. I asked if he was interested, knowing the answer but wanting to be gracious. I went, met some friends and we stopped and analyzed, giggled, got teary eyed, and felt inspired in turn by each painting. Sweet hubby stayed home. We reunited happily at the end of the day and shared our days.
Would I like him to share all my interests? Yes, that would be fun.
But maybe it would be annoying - couldn't tell you cause it never has and barring a personality changing head injury is NOT likely to ever happen. And I know not to guilt him into coming to something he isn't interested in - he will be NO fun. But when we both are enthused - like Infinity Wars End Game coming up - we have the best of times together.
Now my job is to find girlfriends who: love the ballet, want to learn hula, enjoy parades, know the joy of the perfect clearance sale, and can sit in a beach chair all day staring at the ocean. Those will be my new best friends. So far I have the hula and beach chair slots filled. I'm taking applications for the other positions.
What other thoughts are "grounding" me? Not for long, I'm in pursuit now!
Without leaving me 5 seconds of euphoria, he said, "That's gross. Why would anyone want to go see that?"
I felt like a whipped puppy with my tail between my legs as I slunk (that's a word) off to lick my wounds and ponder, "Why WOULD anyone want to go see that?" Holding the flyer in my hands, I sighed big and said to myself, "Well, I guess I don't get to go see that." And went in search of some, you guessed it, Chocolate.
As I was rummaging through the cupboards, I suddenly had a brand new thought. Just because he didn't want to go, did NOT mean I couldn't go. I didn't need his permission and he never withheld it in the first place. I was the one who had "grounded" me from my own exciting adventures.
That had been my pattern for 36 years: excitement, sharing the idea with him, and holding my breath hoping he'd say, "Yes." And disappointment when he didn't want to go, do, or have my great idea. I had put him in the position of Dad. And I was the child petitioning for a favor.
Wait - I'm a grown approaching middle old aged woman (if middle age is 45 then 63 is middle old age) and I could decide Yea or Nay for myself. Just as he did.
What a relief! My brain was exploding. The excitement came back. I called my adventurous son and we scampered off to look at resin covered bodies for hours in every position doing everything imaginable. My wonder and awe grew from one exhibit to another. I had a wonderful, fascinating, memorable afternoon. And so did my husband doing what he choose to do for his Saturday.
The next adventure was a new museum exhibit. I asked if he was interested, knowing the answer but wanting to be gracious. I went, met some friends and we stopped and analyzed, giggled, got teary eyed, and felt inspired in turn by each painting. Sweet hubby stayed home. We reunited happily at the end of the day and shared our days.
Would I like him to share all my interests? Yes, that would be fun.
But maybe it would be annoying - couldn't tell you cause it never has and barring a personality changing head injury is NOT likely to ever happen. And I know not to guilt him into coming to something he isn't interested in - he will be NO fun. But when we both are enthused - like Infinity Wars End Game coming up - we have the best of times together.
Now my job is to find girlfriends who: love the ballet, want to learn hula, enjoy parades, know the joy of the perfect clearance sale, and can sit in a beach chair all day staring at the ocean. Those will be my new best friends. So far I have the hula and beach chair slots filled. I'm taking applications for the other positions.
What other thoughts are "grounding" me? Not for long, I'm in pursuit now!
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